It’s true and it’s kind of funny when you think about it. We spend so much time focusing on the minutia of our lives. And that’s not so bad, I mean, it’s our life. Our one shot to get it right so we should absolutely care about the details.
But the point of this post is to point out that n.o.b.o.d.y. else pays attention to the details of your life like you do. And even if they did, they don’t really care. Which is a little sad when you think of the positive side of things. Like why people fail to notice accomplishments or positive changes you’ve made.
But the flip side of this oblivion that that 99.9% of the time when you think you made a mistake and spend hours agonizing over it — chances are, nobody noticed or cared.
- You’re wearing the wrong outfit or two different socks because you got dressed early and in the dark? So what. Nobody cares.
- Slipped and feel when you’re running? Big deal, shake it off. I guarantee none of the witnesses will be talking about it over dinner. And if they did, it wouldn’t be in reference to you personally anyway.
- Hit send on an email before you wanted to? That can be gut wrenching for a few seconds. But it’s an easy fix. Often just saying “oops, let me finish my thoughts…” and your reader will forget the entire transition so long as you make your point.
- Bad hair day? Let. It. Go. People remember how you make them feel, not the wisps of your brows.
The point is that once you acknolede the little things that go awry, give them a little laugh and explanation if necessary and move. on.
What’s even worse than losing time and focus to worrying about the past…
Is not moving forward, not taking a risk and not doing what you really want to do out of fear of judgement. Because it’s the same thing — nobody is really watching and most of them just don’t care.You should always consider moving forward for you, and not just because insignificant judgements don't matter, most of them don't even exist. Click To Tweet
I don’t write this to sound insensitive or imply everybody is an a**hole with terrible, egocentric intentions. But more to give you permission to go easy on yourself so you can stop sweating the details and take more self-indulgent risks.
How Do I Know This?
Well, I actually don’t know for sure. I’m just pretty sure 😉 I’ve been blogging since 2012 and I used to worry a lot about evaluated and judged. And what I’ve learned, is that in today’s fast paced, digital era — it’s REALLY hard to get people’s attention and I’m happy if anybody even stops to read anything — let alone form an opinion.Catching people's attention is hard today, even when they are sitting right in front of you. So just because you notice every-single-one of your mistakes -- chances are your lunch date won't unless you mention it. Click To Tweet
Manners Still Matter
Now this does not mean that nothing matters. I mean, things like good manners, being prompt and respectful of people’s time is and will always be important and violations of basic human kindness will be noticed and judged (and rightfully so). But the little things … the trivial things that eat up mind space and block forward progress and productive thinking … those things, you should feel good giving yourself permission to let go…
So relax and put your energy towards the good stuff, like planning vacation, setting your next big career goal or just space out and appreciate the beauty around you.